Today I got dirty. I have intended to do this for months and months. Today I left the dark comfort of my nerd-lair and headed out to where the manly-men live, the DIY store.
My quest was veggies for the veggie garden. I had already built, YES I BUILT IT (from a kit), some raised beds, got some mud in ’em and it was time for veggies. The idiot in me fancied growing some Northland Tomato plants, because it would be moronic and funny, but pointless as I do not partake. Probably one of those bad influence kinda-things Dads shouldn’t get up to. (See? I’m learning, I say ****, ****, and **** a lot less now but can’t stop saying Bugger).
First port of call – books. I have slowly accumulated a few books on growing vegetables so, in true nerd style, I read up and decided what to get. Before reading I intended to get carrots, parsnips, lettuce, silver beet and spring onions. After much reading and deliberation and seeking of online advice I ignored everything I had read and set off for Carrots, Parsnips, lettuce, silverbeet and spring onions. Fortuitously not completely stupid choices for February in NZ, though they all wax lyrical about chervil, what the hell is chervil?
So, the DIY store, the bastion of the gorilla alpha male, wall building, kitchen fitting, plumbing, super-man. Not made for nerds, it doesn’t sell computer games, CDs or amusing T-shirts. It does however sell POWER TOOLS! No man can resist a look at POWER TOOLS. Thankfully The Wife usually chaperones me in the DIY store to ensure I dont emerge grinning revving some 3 foot Husqvarna fourstroke chainsaw. She won’t even let me get a piddly little hedge trimmer, on the grounds that I need all my fingers, which is wrong – I only use two to type. I had to resist and scuttled past all the lethal sharp shiny things with my eyes averted.
I swaggered around trying to look manly amongst the veggies. I grabbed a few punnets of green things that proported to be lettuce, onions, spinach and …. stuff and some packs of seeds, none of which were the mythical chervil. I rushed home and started playing in the mud, putting my purchases in lines.
This’ll feed us for months!
My first thought on completion was that The Boy now has a reduced likelihood of Crohn’s disease. Yes, honestly, my first thought. You can take The Nerd out of his clinic …….
It now looks like a veggie garden. There are plants and mud in a non-random pattern – I now garden! Having admired the fruits of my immense horticultural prowess I have realised, they don’t do much do they these plants?
So, contemplating my day’s work, sitting in my garden listening to wind chimes, drinking homebrewed beer I am wondering, have I miscategorised myself? Should I be Hippie Dad? ….. No, he wouldn’t be blogging about it on his Mac at the same time!